a guide to finding your glimmers and a fucking good chocolate chip cookie recipe
a glimmer is a trigger for joy
ANNOUNCEMENT!
my dear friend, my next cookbook, 108 Asian Cookies, is coming this October, and if you preorder now, you will receive a year-long subscription to my premium substack (worth $70) and access to new recipes all year long! Preorders mean so, so much to underrepresented authors like me and show publishers and retailers that voices like mine deserve prominent spaces on the bookshelves!
Thank you!
END OF ANNOUNCEMENT
dear friend,
do you have a favorite movie? I do. It’s Bridget Jones’s Diary, the first one, and not the sequels. My favorite TV shows? The BBC version of Pride and Prejudice, the second season of Bridgerton, and, of course, FRIENDS. It's funny how they are all white people shows.
Raised in NYC, having anxiety and issues is a given for me. I hate not knowing what happens when watching a new movie or TV show, so I always read spoilers. Rewatching my favorite movies or TV shows feels safe. And that feeling, that little burst of dopamine, when you watch your favorite characters fall in love, or when you know, there’s a happy ending in sight, that’s a feeling that a glimmer grants you.
I guess the best way for me to define glimmer for you is that it’s a trigger for joy. When the sun shines brightly after a few days of rain, when a loved one you haven’t seen for a while gives you the biggest bear hug, when your dog greets you at the door, her tail wagging violently… these are all glimmers.
That delicious cookie your neighbor baked freshly just for you, your favorite song playing on the radio, a handwritten note in the mail— all so very glimmerful.
Glimmers are objective, and it’s all about that feeling, but honestly, I don’t believe a viral moment, thousands of likes on a post, and other similar vanity metrics are true glimmers. Sure, all these things can spike our dopamine levels transiently, but then they leave us empty.
True glimmers energize us and make us appreciate the little things in life. They brighten our days, sometimes in subtle, soft ways, and most importantly, true glimmers are hard to buy.
For me, one of the most reliable glimmers comes from baking in my kitchen. The kitchen, whether it was the one in Coney Island, or the one in Bensonhurst, or in my Ah Ma’s apartment in Montreal, or the one I own now, has always been a place of solace for me. No one is unkind in my kitchen. I feel safe, warm, and, most importantly, joyful.
The thing is, I truly believe our glimmers are what nurture our inner child and bring them solace and joy. I never got to bake cookies with my mother as a child. Today, sometimes we bake cookies together, and she’s always so gleeful when she bakes.
It starts with the quiet ritual of walking to my pantry to grab my ingredients, measuring flour, cracking eggs, and hearing the hum of my stand mixer. It’s grounding and meditative. And the smell? Oh, the smell of warm cookies wafting through the kitchen… that’s a glimmer in its purest form. You know how you feel like a kid whenever you walk into your favorite bakery or cake shop? Yup, that’s the feeling, but in my own kitchen.
And the best part? Sharing. Bringing a fresh cookie upstairs to my husband who has been coding all day at his desk. Packing cookies for my 76-year-old Cantonese mother to share with her best friend on their walks. Leaving cookies out on the table for my son when he comes home from school.
That first warm cookie handed to someone you love. Watching their face light up as melted chocolate smudges their lips, as they nod mid-bite and mumble something like “holy crap, this is so good.” Or in my mother’s case, “wow, this is not too sweet!”
That’s the moment I savor. It becomes a memory. It’s my glimmer.
What brings you joy, even if it’s just a little hit of dopamine, embrace that. That’s your glimmer. Your trigger for joy. Those moments that bring you peace or bring happy tears to your eyes, whatever it is, you deserve that glimmer today and every day moving forward.
TIPS ON FINDING YOUR GLIMMERS THIS WEEK
Rewatch your favorite movie.
Reread your favorite book.
Listen to your favorite song(s). Be sure to sing along.
Eat your favorite meal.
Share your favorite meal.
Take a deep breath and let the sun hit your face.
Light a candle that smells like a memory.
Text someone just to say hi.
Pet your dog, your cat, or someone else’s.
Dance in your kitchen—even badly.
Laugh at a meme until you cry.
Let yourself rest. Really rest. SNORE AWAY!
Give someone a real hug. A nice, long, big bear hug.
And perhaps your glimmer today is baking my fucking good chocolate chip cookie.
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