why people don't really like free things

and why you need to start charging for your brilliance like Pamela Anderson and I did on Substack (and how to get started!) plus a recipe!

ANNOUNCEMENT

my dear friend, my next cookbook, 108 Asian Cookies, is coming this October, and if you preorder now, you will receive a year-long subscription to my premium substack (worth $70) and access to new recipes all year long! Preorders mean so, so much to underrepresented authors like me and show publishers and retailers that voices like mine deserve prominent spaces on the bookshelves! Thank you!

END OF ANNOUNCEMENT

Holgate glaciar in Seward, Alaska June 10, 2025

dear friend,

Let’s not pretend anymore that we appreciate free things. You may say you love freebies but in reality, you don’t.

I see food court staff try to hand out grilled chicken on toothpicks and no one grabs one. You may download that free PDF but will actually never open it to read it. And you probably ignore or roll your eyes at any free advice tossed at you.

You hate free things because free things don’t ask you to show up. They don’t challenge you. And you didn’t have to earn them.

It’s why books like “Why Men Love Bitches” and “The Art of Being a Bitch” exist for women who give themselves too freely to people who only take, take, take. Ever notice how you’re super nice and kind to someone and it’s often not reciprocated?

Nice people, well they don’t pose as a challenge. They don’t demand anything in return. They simply give their love and service for free.

Like doormats, they’re stepped on.

Free things, likewise, aren’t coveted.

And here’s the hard truth: Free is unvalued. Free is the fastest way to be forgotten.

As an author, content creator, and influencer online, I know this deep down. We creators and writers, we pour our brilliance, time, energy, soul, and legacy into something, be it our content or our Substack recipes, and often give it away… for free! But for what?

Simply for likes? For follows? For empty praise and kind comments?

You see, for the longest time, I did that. I felt like an imposter, deeply engulfed in a sea of doubt. I thought no one would pay me for my recipes. No one would pay me to speak at a public event. I was nervous to ask brands for money when they asked me to promote their products. And I used to hand out everything including recipes that took me days to months to develop, or my time, or my resources, or my valuable advice.

My Substack was basically a free gourmet buffet. And guess what people chose?
They didn’t choose me, that’s for sure. I struggled to grow a following here. I spent days wondering if I should ever put up a paywall on my posts.

Then one day, not long ago, I woke up and saw that Pamela Anderson charges for her Substack posts.

And that flipped a switch in me.

A celebrity is using a platform I thought was meant for, well, non-celebrities like me to share our thoughts. People like me who struggle to be heard. It reminded me that Substack is meant for everyone to share their thoughts and stories, and everyone who wishes to, to make a profit or a living from their words and content.

It’s for anyone with something to say, something to teach, something worth paying for.

If Pamela can use Substack to own her voice and value, so can we.

So I did. At first, I set my price to under $5 a month. Soon I reached my first hundred paid subscribers! HOLY HECK. Then, I wondered if people would still support me if I raised my prices. People love paying for gourmet and bespoke and expensive things, because they attribute higher prices to better quality, no? So I made the jump and set my price to $7/month and $70/year. I stopped giving everything away for free and started owning my value like my rent (well, mortgage) depended on it (because, uh, it kinda does).

And my people? They stayed. They paid. They cheered me on.

Working with brands these days, I never offer any of my services and time for free. And I charge premium prices too for my work, starting at four figures.

See, it turns out when you treat your work like it’s worth something, others do too.

Turns out when you start valuing yourself, others follow suit.

Why Free Isn't Generous: It's Self-Erasure

You think you're building goodwill by giving it all away. But you’re actually training people to undervalue you.

Free attracts:

• Drive-by readers

• High-maintenance lurkers

• The “Can I pick your brain?” crowd who slide into your DMs

But when you charge—even a small amount—you attract:

• Supporters

• Superfans

• People who see you. People who get you. People who want to succeed and thrive

Let’s be blunt for a second, shall we? People are more demeaning and demanding when they get things for free. It’s twisted but true. But once they pay—even $5?—they suddenly say, “Thank you.” They treat you like a pro. They respect your time.

Here's How to Start Charging on Substack (Without Feeling Weird About It)